Mission 14; High Tidings

What's up true believers, die-hard fans, and general people of high integrity. Today we are back to tell you about a cultural event we attended called the birthday party. This display of pure hedonism took place in honor of our friend the Pottery Barn Kids cover boy The Riley Gillespie's 2nd birthday. Quite an event. We were excited to see our celebrity friend again, but apparently at the age of two he has converted into a being of pure energy and was moving at the speed of light. I'm sure he was having a good time though. He received many gifts, as I understand is the ritual in such cases. It seemed like a fine time was had by all. So My shipmate and I decided to try to join in by singing our finest fightsongs, which I guess our parents took as a sign to leave the party. Ignorant wretches. The Riley! We wish you the very best in your next transcendental state! While on the topic of gifts, we have noticed of late that our parents seem very anxious about the subject of Crispness
We are unclear what this might be about since they tend to like their clothes wrinkled. They keep saying things like "what should we do about Crispness" and "I am afraid of Crispness, I want to hide under the covers." We are a bit confused, as nothing in this house seems very crisp, what with the humidity. This may be the reason that Mom has bought several new pairs of boxer shorts for Dad, and it could be why Dad hid that lovely sweater in that tissue paper, but who can be sure? All we know is that Crispness is a state of mind. We'd love to tell them that, but we don't want to interfere in a household drama that we find so entertaining.
So instead we will try to be like The Riley Gillespie and attempt to move faster than the speed of light.